By Nicole Baker
Staff Writer
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You ask your friend, “So, you want to go shopping with me on Friday?” She doesn’t answer. In fact, she’s completely silent, creating a somewhat awkward atmosphere. You see, you were just in the middle of a conversation with your best friend, when she received a text from her boyfriend.
Now she’s so consumed by texting him that she’s completely ignoring the fact that you’re right in front of her, and trying to make plans to hang out. I’m sure we’ve all experienced this situation—maybe we were even the ones creating it. Sadly, this seems to be the undeniable state of our world, as social media and innovative technology infiltrate our lives more each day.
Don’t get me wrong—I’m all for smartphones, Twitter, Facebook, etc. After all, how else would I know what my best friend’s brother ate for breakfast yesterday morning? These innovations keep us connected with others, so we feel a sense of belonging and companionship, which generally makes us feel good about ourselves. Yet, these innovations just might come at the expense of face-to-face interactions with real people.
And by face-to-face, I don’t mean video chatting—I mean actually sitting down and talking with someone over lunch, or stopping to talk with someone you know as you pass them by on campus. So many of us are so accustomed to texting people or Facebook messaging them that we don’t know how to talk or act when we see these people in person. Many of us may resort to texting, emailing, or messaging others just to avoid awkward silences that occur when talking face-to-face. Unfortunately, we’re all guilty.
This “de-socialization of society,” if you will, is directly caused by the advanced technology of our smartphones that allow us to multitask. In short, our phones are our lifelines. We use them to communicate, get our news, play games, go shopping, find dates, pay our bills, and do our math homework. Yet, we use all of these possibilities to allow us to escape the reality of our physical environment. After all, how many of us have used our phones as an excuse to get out of awkward situations with other people? When we’re forced to work in groups and don’t know what else to say to our group members, for example.
To escape the uncomfortable feeling that ensues, we automatically pull out our phones. Or when we’re walking down the street and we see someone approaching that we don’t really want to talk to, we pull out our phones and act like we’re so consumed in a conversation that we didn’t even notice them. Quite simply, our smart phones are our “ticket” to escape the demands that reality would otherwise place on us.
There have been many instances in which I have been talking to someone, only to be interrupted by the other person answering a phone call, returning a text, or scrolling through Facebook posts. While I know that every one of us is guilty of this simply because it’s the way our culture is structured, it still makes me angry.
I can’t help but feel as if I’m boring the other person to death. Since when did wireless networks and cyberspace take precedence over someone’s physical presence, anyway? I was always taught to give my full attention to whoever was talking to me in a face-to-face conversation, before answering any phone calls. Where did that world go?
What’s worse than the anti-social behavior of those who are completely consumed by their phones is the oblivion that these people often exhibit while they are on such devices…which is pretty much all the time. Ever see the people who walk down the sidewalk so intently looking at Facebook that they don’t see the telephone pole in front of them? While this is pretty funny, I’ve actually seen it happen.
Or how about those who have to check their phones as they’re crossing the road? While their life might be in danger from the cars coming from both directions, apparently the status that their 22-year-old cousin posted about taking an afternoon nap in her pink Hello Kitty footie pajamas is more important.
All joking aside, the attention that we so often give to social media and the devices that help us access it not only jeopardize our physical safety, but also endanger the future of our face-to-face social interactions. While we may not think anything of checking our phones while talking to others, it’s important to keep in mind that by doing so, we are essentially telling these people that we are no longer interested in what they have to say, or that we have better things to be doing.
Whether we intend to send these messages or not, so many of us are accustomed to checking our phones constantly that we often don’t know what a real, uninterrupted conversation with another person is like. So next time you’re out with others, try delving into this archaic form of communication. It might just surprise you how refreshing it is. It may even be more revitalizing than looking at your cellular telephone.
